English Bulldogs can TALK!


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Super Hero’s shouldn’t have to sit in Time Out!

I once had an English Bulldog that could talk. I know you’re thinking …..”shut-uuupp” but it’s true.

I took him for a walk one time and strayed a little too far without water so we stopped in at the local tavern for a soda. Now a tavern or bar as they are called in my part of the world is not the kind of place either one of us are comfortable in but they had water and sodas and believe you me, we were thirsty.

In we go, only to be stopped by a big fella known around the world as a bouncer. He said “you can’t bring that dog in here”.

“He is a special dog” I told him.

“What makes him so Special?” asked the Bouncer. He had a sneer on his face I didn’t like.

“This Bulldog can talk” I replied with a sneer of my own.

I guess the bouncer didn’t like being mocked because he grabbed me and was about to throw me out…. I of course won’t let just anybody manhandle me….. ok,ok, I squeaked out “I can prove it, I can prove it…”

The big guy let me go and said “prove it little man and you both can stay but pull any funny stuff and your both out on your ear.”

I wasn’t worried.

I turned to AC and asked “AC, how was the walk over here?” AC said “rruff”.

The bouncer said that wasn’t good enough and pointed to the door.

I quickly turned to AC understanding my first attempt to prove my little buddy could talk failed miserably. “AC… what is this thing called that is hanging over our heads?” I was hoping he would say it was a ceiling but NOOOO…. AC said “rroof”.

The big guy grabbed me again and I immediately started pleading for just one more opportunity to prove AC spoke the English language as well as a smattering of Spanish. The bouncer let me go with a finger in face and said “this is your last chance.”

I turned one last time to AC and asked “AC, who is the greatest baseball player of all time?”

AC said “RRuth”.

As I lay on the ground racked with pain and dust in my face. I look at AC. AC looks at me.

AC says “DiMaggio?”

Charles Holt

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One response to “English Bulldogs can TALK!

  1. Ray Buxton, In God we Trust

    Hey there young man. Hope all is well with you and the family. Have not heard much from you except for the little bit about the weather you guys have been having. I never met Ace but from what all you write about him, he must have been a heck of a dog. Everytime I see a Bull Dog I think of you and him. I saw one the other day that a family was giving away and I started to get him and send him to you. Elaine would not let me since we did not know if you could have him or not. I am back in Salt Lake and so tired of the weather (cold and snow) that I could spit. lol How is Roxy doing these days? Hey have you heard anything from Douche Bag since he quit Brand. I worked with him up at Carters Creek and when he went down to Denver they had nothing for him at home so he quit or that is what I was told. Did you sell your Motor Home or you still trying to pay for it and a house. That would be tough. I was not going to come back to Salt Lake but the Tesero Safety people said for Brand to do what ever they could do to get me back up here. So here I am. Not sure how long I will make it but am going to try my best. Let me hear from you every now and then buddy. How about our buddy that went up north, is he still up there or is he back down close working. Cannot remember his name right now. Must be getting old. Take care buddy and when you think about it say a prayer for Elaine and I and Toby that we will make it the year and a half that they want me to stay here.

    Ray Buxton In God We Trust

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